So now you’re divorced. Now what? Well, today I’m going to talk to you a little bit about next steps after that divorce is finalized.
Like we’ve been trying to demonstrate all along, and I hope you’ve gathered this so far, we’re not like other firms. We’re not going to push contentious litigation. We’re going to try to help our clients get to the other side in the least stressful way possible. Sometimes you can’t avoid it, but a lot of times you can and we try to guide you in that way. And through doing that, we always say to people once the divorce is finalized, don’t forget, it’s still a time to ask for help. And by help, I mean, consider counseling. A lot of my clients consider a post decree counseling and I always encourage them to. If for any reason you can’t afford counseling, most churches and synagogues and mosques have free counseling. There’s also counseling at a county level, like here in Jefferson County. Jefferson County Mental Health provides free counseling. So, consider it. Consider asking for help and not thinking, “This is a line in the sand. I’m all done and I don’t need help anymore.” All of us could use a little help.
The second thing you should consider post-divorce is to let the kids be kids, meaning let them play in their play groups, let them meet with their friends, be sure to attend their activities, you know, together, be sure that both parents are there, if at all possible, including meeting with the school counselor or being at sporting events, whatever it is, but let the kids be kids. Don’t let them overhear, you know, post-degree negotiations about schedules or any of that stuff. Be sure that you are being the parent you would want to be. When you look back on this in twenty years, what kind of a parent are you being right now? And try to ask yourself that question and answer it in a way that would make you proud.
The last thing I want to talk to you about is be sure if you haven’t started already, to start some self-care around the divorce. It may be hard to accept the reality of the divorce on whatever level, financial, emotional, and you may need a place to go with those feelings. You may also need to just go take a walk in beautiful Colorado and get some exercise and fresh air. So, there are many things you can do for self-care after a divorce. But what you do have to remember is to actually do it. Because it is a time of healing. It’s a time of acceptance, and going forward, you just need to make sure that you are the parent, if you have kids, or the person you want to be after the divorce.
If you still have any issues at all around the divorce or questions, feel free to give our office a call. We’re standing by and we’re happy to answer any questions you might have about it.