You’ve Done Everything for Your Family — Now What?
If you’re a stay-at-home mom in Lakewood and you’re facing divorce, you may feel like your whole world is about to shift. For years, your focus has been on your children, your household, and keeping everything running smoothly. Now you’re being asked to make legal, financial, and personal decisions that can feel overwhelming, especially without a steady income or career to fall back on.
The truth is, you’re not alone. Many stay-at-home moms have walked this same road. At The Drake Law Firm, we’ve worked with women who thought they had no options, only to discover they had more strength, support, and legal protection than they realized. This blog is here to walk you through what matters most as you go through a divorce.
What Divorce Really Means for a Stay-at-Home Mom
The Shift From One Role to Many
Divorce often pushes stay-at-home moms into new roles—provider, co-parent, decision-maker. It’s a big shift, but one you can make with guidance and the right support system.
Your Contributions Still Count
Even without a paycheck, your caregiving and non-monetary household support matter. Colorado courts recognize the value of these efforts when determining property and debt division, parenting arrangements, and financial support.
Your Rights and Priorities During Divorce
What the Court Actually Considers
Colorado family courts look beyond income. They factor in your role in raising the children, managing the home, and supporting your spouse’s career. Your contributions are real, and they’re part of the legal equation.
Common Fears You Might Have:
Will I lose my kids because I don’t work?
No. Custody is based on the child’s best interests, not which parent earns more.
How will I afford a lawyer?
Legal fees can often be requested and court-ordered during the divorce, and sometimes included in the divorce settlement. We will also offer guidance on how to move forward, even without an income.
What to Think About Early
Focus on what matters most to you: time with your children, housing, financial support, and long-term stability. You don’t need to solve it all today, but identifying your top priorities helps create your next steps.
What to Expect Financially
Child Support and Parenting Time
Colorado calculates child support based on both parents’ income and how parenting time is divided. But if you’ve been the one managing day-to-day childcare: meals, school pickups, doctor visits, etc, that still carries real weight in the court’s decision.
Know that Colorado courts will impute gross monthly income to you once your youngest child is 24 months old. That means, if your children are older than two years, you will be assigned an income whether you have a job or not, and it’s best to start planning for this early.
Example: If your spouse earns $80,000 a year and you’ve been the full-time parent, but the youngest child is over the age of two years, and you are only capable of earning minimum wage, the court will calculate child support based on the combined monthly income of each parent, including your minimum wage gross income.
Factors That Influence Child Support
Child support calculations also include the number of overnights each parent has, any daycare costs paid by one parent, the children’s portion of health insurance paid by one parent, and sometimes, any extraordinary expenses that are agreed upon and reasonable.
Remember, the court will assign you a monthly income of some sort if the youngest child is over the age of two years, even if you haven’t had recent income. If you are being paid spousal maintenance (alimony), that monthly payment will be added to your gross monthly income and subtracted from your spouse’s gross monthly income for the child support calculation as well.
While your role as a stay-at-home mom is important, Colorado law requires an imputation of income for child support to stay-at-home moms once the youngest child reaches two years old.
Spousal Maintenance
Also called alimony, spousal maintenance helps you regain stability while you transition into life after divorce.
In Colorado, courts look at several factors when deciding whether maintenance is appropriate, including:
- The length of your marriage
- The lifestyle you had during the marriage
- The income gap between you and your former spouse
- Your need for maintenance
- The upside spouse’s ability to pay
- How long it may take for you to re-enter the workforce
For example, if you need to finish specialized training or plan on completing a college degree, the court may take that into consideration as well.
Who Qualifies For Spousal Support?
Let’s say you’ve been married for over 10 years, stayed home to raise your children, and haven’t worked in a while. The court may award temporary spousal support in the form of maintenance to help cover your living expenses while you are in the process of divorce and starting your life over again.
In shorter marriages, or if both partners earn similar amounts, spousal maintenance may be lower or not awarded at all. But the court will still assess whether support is needed based on the full picture. And Colorado law states that once a marriage is over three years, spousal maintenance may be awarded for half the length of the marriage.
Again, it is needs-based and also based on the spouse’s ability to pay. And that calculation can include an imputation of your income even if you haven’t been in the workforce for a long time.
Dividing Property and Debt
Colorado is an equitable distribution of property state. Equitable does not always mean equal; instead, it means fair. But most of the time, the courts divide assets in a divorce equally, depending on a number of factors.
The court looks at each spouse’s financial contributions, but also non-financial efforts like caregiving and homemaking, although, again, once the youngest child is over the age of two years, both spouses are expected to earn a living.
Example: If your spouse was the main income earner but you supported their career by running the home and raising the kids, you are still entitled to an equitable portion of the equity in the house, the retirement savings, or other shared assets.
What Counts As “Fair” in Colorado
Only what you both acquired during the marriage is considered marital property. Gifts, inheritances, or anything owned before the marriage usually stay with the original owner if they are kept in separate accounts. However, any increase in the value of separate property during the marriage is marital.
An exception to separate property staying separate is when something like an inheritance gets deposited into a joint account. When that happens, it’s usually treated as a presumed gift to the marriage.
Parenting Plans and Custody
What a Parenting Plan Covers
Parenting plans go beyond custody. Parenting Plans outline, among other things:
- Whether Decision-Making will be joint or sole, and decision-making covers the big decisions, including education, medical, and religion.
- Where your children will live and how many overnights each parent will have with them.
- How holidays, birthdays, and school breaks will be shared.
- How you and your co-parent will communicate.
- Whether a parent is allowed to relocate to another part of the state or another state with the children.
- How decisions on extra-curricular activities will be made, and who will pay what percentage of those agreed-upon expenses.
Parenting plans are all about building stability and minimizing conflict so your children have a consistent routine.
Example:
In Colorado, parenting plans can look different depending on the family’s situation:
- 50/50 Shared Schedules – such as alternating weeks or a 2-2-5-5 routine
- Primary Residence Model – where one parent has the children most of the time, and the other has scheduled parenting time (weekends, holidays, etc.)
- Joint or Sole Decision-Making – responsibilities like medical or educational decisions may be shared or assigned to one parent
There’s no one-size-fits-all parenting plan. What matters most is creating a setup that supports your child’s emotional and developmental needs.
The Court’s Focus
Judges prioritize your child’s emotional, physical, and developmental needs. In Colorado, the best interests of the child are the standard. Whether you’ve been working or not doesn’t determine your parenting ability. Stability, safety, and a supportive environment matter most, but the reality of life is that you probably need to find meaningful work and choose to make a living.
Rebuilding After Divorce: Next Steps for Stay-at-Home Moms
Getting Back Into the Workforce
Lakewood has resources to help—from job training and resume support to flexible or remote work opportunities. Re-entering the workforce may feel overwhelming, but this new chapter can be one of growth and eventually, satisfaction and a sense of purpose as your children grow older and eventually leave home to start their own lives.
Housing, Healthcare, and Support Services
If you’re worried about basic needs, there are resources that can help, including Medicaid/CHP+, rental assistance, and community programs. These tools exist to help you get back on solid ground, not as a crutch, but as a bridge.
What You Can Do Right Now
Clarify Your Needs
Start small. Write down what you need most right now, whether it’s time with your kids, financial breathing room, or a stable place to live. Or all three. Clarity helps build momentum. Once you have the basics down, start thinking about what you really want, what your goals are, and how you can achieve them over time.
Consider some career counseling or even a life coach. Build out a plan with steps and goals to get you where you need to go. Don’t shortchange yourself and never underestimate yourself.
Get Guidance From Someone Who Understands
You’ve taken care of everyone else. Now it’s time to have someone in your corner during a divorce. The right Lakewood divorce lawyer won’t just explain your options; we’ll walk you through each step and help you make decisions that protect your future.
Let’s Talk About What Comes Next
You’ve built a life around caring for others. Let us help you now take care of yourself.
At The Drake Law Firm, we help stay-at-home moms in Lakewood move forward with clarity, protection, and real support. If you’re ready to explore your options, we’re here to listen, without pressure.
Call The Drake Law Firm today for a private, supportive consultation with a divorce attorney.